When it all comes down to it...

     This is my family. Well most of it, My dad is already asleep, and I am missing the most recent family picture from that side, so they'll get their own post later, and my cousin Jennifer and her two girls (Tiffany and Kayla) are missing from this picture, but other then that, we're all there. This is just the direct lineage from my grandparents, not including the second cousins that were at this same party.  There's so much that you can get from this picture about our family.
     The first thing is the location of this picture. It was taken at my grandparents 60th anniversary party at the local Boilermaker's union hall. My grandparents got married when my grandma was 14 and my grandpa was significantly older, I don't remember exactly how much older, but quite a bit. They have worked hard their entire lives to become both financially and spiritually secure and to leave both of those legacies for generations to come. My grandpa was a boilermaker, He was disabled in the 70's from falling and had a big fall where he hurt his back permanently. My uncle is a boilermaker, my cousin is a boilermaker and other cousins have worked as boilermakers in the past. Even this legacy is something to be proud of.  I was in a parent conference last week and asked the student what he wanted to do when he grew up and he told me he wanted to be a boilermaker like his dad. I mentioned that my family was full of boilermakers and it was an instant source of connection that linked this students family and my own and gave me a deeper insight into his family. I am proud of the work my family has done and continues to do and the importance of hard work that they have always instilled in all of us.
     The next thing you notice is that there are a lot of us. My grandparents have 3 kids (my mom, aunt and uncle) who all together have 9 kids who have 7 spouses between us and have 17 1/2 kids between us (Chrissy is pregnant now). Not all of us are blood related, there are adopted kids, there are step-kids, but when it comes down to it, you would never know by watching our family who is who. We are family.
 My mom (go ahead and try and pick her out in the picture, she looks pretty much just like me) and I have been us against the world for as long as I can remember. She was my biggest cheerleader and motivator for as long as I can remember. She has gently and not so gently pushed and encouraged me to be as successful as humanly possible at everything I've ever wanted to do. She had a way of knowing when my pushy, over achieving self needed a break even before I did and was always the first to make me take one, even if I was doing everything I could to refuse it. That was the most helpful thing anyone has ever taught me to be honest, and it's still a lesson I struggle with regularly.
    My aunts and uncles have been right behind my mom encouraging me and protecting me through out my life. Our family is not real big on boundaries which is an awful thing sometimes, but is awesome in the way that regardless of the situation, people speak their mind. Not awesome in the way that everyone  is involved in everyone's business at all times, but with 4 extra back up parents hanging around all of the time, there was no getting away with anything.
     I was an only child until I was 12. My sister and I have a huge age gap so even after she came, I still was functional as an only child. Never fear...4 of my cousins lived across the field and the rest lived an hour a way. There have been times in my life when I've needed each one differently, but I can think of a specific time when I have depended on each one of them as if they were my siblings in my life. My cousin Ryan and I are 6 months apart, so growing up, we were the best of friends and the worst of enemies...at this point though, it's settled into a best of friends pattern. In college, we could be and were vicious to each other, but no one else has ever been allowed to say anything about the other. Growing up Shelley and Jennifer were the older sisters I never had. I got to go on dates with them (I'm sure that was not their choice looking back on that, but they never seemed to argue about it, at least not in front of me) but they always made me feel included. John was the big brother I needed. I knew that I took priority over just about any girl (or anyone else with John for that matter) when I was little. He also managed to terrify any guy I ever dated that he got to meet, including Jason. Chrissy has been who I have been the closest to out of that set of cousins as an adult. She and I parent the most similarly and tend to have similar outlooks on life. She willingly ran around with me for days at a time this summer with a whole brood of kids and even without them :-). Keri and Ronda have been the most honest encouragers for me. They let me know when I screw up and act like an idiot (well really anyone will do that for me) but then they also let me know how to help fix it. We all struggle together and hurt when the other hurts.
       I realize now as an adult that what we have as a family is not normal. There are some who are not as involved with each other as the rest of us are at any point in time, and that's ok too. Jennifer swears I'm the favorite grandkid, but I had to listen to grandma and grandpa tell me how wonderful she was for 15 minutes a few weeks ago :-). There are seasons for everything, but the one thing that never changes is that when it comes down to it, we have each other's backs.
       Most of our family has struggled with weight at some point in time. Some have struggled with wanting to gain weight, but most have struggled with wanting to lose it, and some with both. My whole family (and everybody else in the world) knows that I am in a season of trying to win a battle of health with my body. I get sweet encouraging notes from my family on a regular basis. It's amazing how they know my heart enough to encourage me, without making me feel like I'll be less then worthy if I don't lose any more weight. It's a sensitive balance for someone like me.  I am still not great at taking compliments, so I often times don't respond because I don't know how to. I appreciate the encouragement more then what any of you realize. I am working towards being able to take it without hesitation :-)