Confession Time

     It's confession time....I have fallen off the wagon. I haven't fallen off, gotten run over and been left for dead as the rest of the wagon train keeps going...I've simply lost my balance, slipped and continued walking next to the wagon. For anyone who knows me, a slip and fall is entirely likely in any capacity for me.
     Let's start with the food. I haven't completely lost my marbles, but I had forgotten about that gusto that made every single thing I put into my mouth a choice. Not as in obsessing about it (more on that later) but as in I can eat a peach (which I love) or ice cream (which I love), well the ice cream is closer, so there ya go! I have fallen off making sure everyone has whole food lunches for school/work and that there is legitimate dinner at night. I may or may not have stooped as low as Bob the Builder brown rice pasta one day this week. See...not an awful choice, but not the best choice I can make for my family.
    The working out...oh the working out. I have this fantastic man named Joey who makes me want to (and not so occasionally makes me actually) say not very nice words to him. I am making progress. I can lift things I couldn't before, I can hold Jonah with less effort. I can run faster and longer and can hold a plank for 40 seconds...all progress. It has gotten substantially harder to get to the gym every day. In fact last week, I made it there not at all. Granted, my asthma was really bad and I was on some meds that limit working out to get that back under control, but if I really wanted to I could've gone to swim or walk or something at least. Instead, I took my commercial grade cough syrup at 9 and then stayed asleep until 6:30 the next morning. It was blissful, and I don't think I coughed one time all night. Success!
    The weight loss....I am stuck bouncing right around my lb mark. That is the 10% spot for me. I have lost 10% of my body weight give or take a pound on any given day. I'm excited about that. It's the first time it's ever happened. Ever. My metabolic issues (thyroid and PCOS) still seem to be completely at bay (I am still on thyroid meds, just at a much lower dose, and my thyroid is way less swollen then it was 4 or 5 months ago). So healthwise...improved.
    I went to the doctor the other day for asthma junk and the MA who did all of my vitals and everything is someone who I'm pretty familiar with since the whole family uses the same doctor and has for 3 or so years now and we are not exactly uncomplicated.  She used the regular blood pressure cuff and it worked! None of this looking at my arm, deciding she needed a bigger one or starting to use the regular one and the walk of shame as they have to go find the bigger one, just the regular old every day blood pressure cuff. A step towards normalcy. I was super excited about the normal blood pressure cuff and she was a bit confused about my excitement until I reminded her that they normally had to use the bigger one...then she joined me in my excitement. Clearly it's not as much of a thought to them about which blood pressure cuff is being used, but I noticed it every single time. As Dr. H was leaving the room, he stopped and came back in and asked me about Jonah and Jason and how the healthy eating was going and told me that he was so amazed that food has made that much of a difference in helping us get towards healthy. I am blessed to have a doctor that encourages that sort of thing instead of trying to overmedicate for things that don't need medication. He also looked at my chart again and said my weight looked great and he wasn't worried about that at all. Words I've never heard from a doctor...ever. Even as a kid (when I really wasn't overweight at all) my pediatrician (who was a wonderful wonderful doctor from Thailand) would poke me in the side and tell me I was going to get a little pudgy if I didn't watch it. Now...is my weight really great, no...but in comparison, we're definitely making progress and it's noticeable, which is even more exciting.

    So all of that to say...I'm ready to stop walking slightly behind the wagon and get back on it. I'm still not feeling 100% from my asthma flare up/cold last week, but I'm better. I think cleaning up my diet completely again and exercising regularly again will get me back to 100% quicker.
    This week I'm shooting for the more attainable goal of the gym MWF and sticking to the menu plan all week. I made two different types of soup today. One is a cabbage soup (I'm not sure why, but my family always called it Dolly Parton soup) and a beef stew. Both are still simmering now and my house smells really good. I stole a bowl of the DP soup a bit early and it was good even without being completely done. I am also going to crock pot cook a chicken tomorrow and plan on cooking steaks one day this week and maybe do a spaghetti (with brown rice pasta) or something similar one night. We will sit down tomorrow evening as a family and make a meal plan everyone can help with and be excited about. I am also going to get back to blogging here...It seems to hold me a bit more accountable to myself and to everyone else if I know someone else is watching what I'm doing.